"In its encounter with Nature, science inevitably elicits a sense of reverence and awe.  The very act of understanding is a celebration of joining, merging, even if on a very modest scale, with the magnificence of the Cosmos.  And the cumulative worldwide buildup of knowledge over time converts science into something only a little short of a transnational, transgenerational meta-mind.
"Spirit" comes from the Latin word "to breath".  What we breathe is air, which is certainly matter, however thin.  Despite usage to the contrary, there is no necessary implication in the word 'spiritual' that we are talking of anything other than matter (including the matter of which the brain is made), or anything outside the realm of science.  On occasion, I will feel free to use the word.  Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality.  When we recognize our place in a immensity of light-years and in the passage of ages, when we grasp the intricacy, beauty, and subtlety of life, then that soaring feeling, that sense of elation and humility combined, is surely spiritual.  So are our emotions in the presence of great art or music or literature, or of acts of exemplary selfless courage such as those of Mohandas Gandhi or Martin Luther King, Jr.  The notion that science and spirituality are somehow mutually exclusive does a disservice to both."


-Carl Sagan. "The Demon-Haunted World"

-One day Mara, the Evil One, was traveling through the villages of India with his attendants. He saw a man doing a walking meditation and  whose face was lit up with wonder. The man had just discovered something on the ground in front of him.
Mara's attendant asked what it was the man had seen and Mara replied, "A piece of truth."
"Doesn't this bother you when someone finds a piece of truth, O Evil One?" his attendant asked.
"No," Mara replied. "Right after this, they usually make a belief out of it."-

A fun little story I stumbled upon.

2009 is coming!

New years is my favorite.
Tony reeled in several views for me via adcast. Sneaky sneaky monkey!

So hello new viewers! I appreciate your feedback.

Dawn bought me a subscription...cause she's a sweetheart. (Coming home around the 2nd )

Thanks for being so damn supportive, I love you guys.

Its been an interesting year to say the least. I will spare you the sentimental introspection and simply say that I finally feel like myself again.
Its been awhile. Years. Good to be back.

I wish you all the very best.  
Its been a difficult year for...almost everyone, lets hope 2009 will be better.

Thanks for making my world a little brighter.

I'm about to watch a school Christmas program....
Yay

So heres the news.

1.) My brother will be getting married next year. October 17th. Congratulations fellow Eddelman spawn.


2.) Dawn's man is back from Iraq.


3.) I am working with acrylic now.


And thats the news.

Goodnight.

I will keep it short.

I made it into the local gallery (which is apparently more exclusive than I thought).
The Vessel, Enantiodromia, and Bemused will be my introductory pieces.
The framing couldn't possibly be cooler.
I have to wait two weeks before hanging.


I am incredibly lethargic yet unusually giddy at the same time.
One minute I can't wait to go back to bed and the next I break into spontaneous dance.
Makes things interesting thats for sure.

I want to vote already...I am very impatient. I always stare at my little registration card. It taunts me.


Happy Halloween you crazy cats!

PHEW!!

The last few weeks have been pretty strange.
Its been great.  
My journey started at 1:30 in the morning when Tony rolled over and said, "I cant sleep...maybe we should just take off."
"Right now?"
"Yup."
We weighed the pros and cons and finally decided that it would be best to just go to Indiana on a whim and surprise my parents when we showed up six hours early.

I was up for...well...over thirty hours, having had only a two hour nap.
We blew out a tire on the interstate.
BIG hassle of course.
This was the first event of the series that followed. I don't think I will bother covering every single little thing that went wrong, suffice to say, there was bad luck at every turn.

It was so completely and utterly worth it though. The trip was quite a learning experience for Tony and I. There was always some conversation going on. We wandered around the Bloomington campus and found genuine asian ramen noodles (two spice packs and fat noodles! WOOT).
We visited the Tibetan community center where the Dalai Lama's brother used to live. It was SO beautiful, overwhelmingly so.
Since then Buddhism has been an especially popular subject. Spirituality in general really. My mind has been in constant transition. Consistently musing. I love feeling so awake.

My family was amazing as always. We left with a wealth of books and other gifts.
I got to meet Dawn's wonderful daughter finally. Its impossible not to fall in love with her. Shes so precious.
My grandparent's house is pretty freaky but is still relatively familiar. Its amazing that they finished it so quickly.

Well I don't want to ramble too much (too late? lol)
I am in a strange frame of mind. I am learning to love the mystery of life.

Well life is a little less than enchanting these days. Its actually been quite bleak since I last posted.
Needless to say, I haven't been especially inspired.

It was another low point...luckily I believe the worst is behind me now.  Life generally seems less horrifically lonely. I am comfortable being in my skin again.
The solution is always the same.
Just keep striving for the light at the end of the tunnel, trust that it is there.
There is always a solution.
So now I emerge from another of life's abysmal labyrinths...hopefully a bit wiser.

I will return home on september 11th.
It will be nice to be back in my element for awhile.

New artwork is coming...I think. lol
Just gotta take it easy and not force it.
Thanks for sticking around through the boring season.

YAY!!
My best friend Dawn had her baby this morning.

Delilah Marie.
Welcome to the planet Earth!

Dawn's man got back from Iraq today as well. So life is freaking fantastic.
I wish you guys the very best!


My Tony has had a major epiphany and will be returning to college in the near future. Seems he has found something he has a passion and propensity for. He is thinking something in the realm of physics, astrophysics, astronomy...all of them actually lol.
Anything to study this amazing thing we call the universe.
Did I mention he is quite a smart cookie?
I'm very proud of him.


Through this, we came to the conclusion that we should return to Indiana.
Tony can go to IU, there will be far more opportunities in the art world, and best of all, my family will be close by.
We miss you crazy bastards lol.

We are not certain exactly when all this will take place, there are always complications. At least we have a goal now.

Now we just gotta be patient and try not to go batty.
(It is quite difficult sometimes.)


My grandparent's house is almost done. I hear it looks amazing.

Good job people!   

All you crazy kids out there, I hope you are well.
If not, well...

Consider the lilies of the goddamn field!



Bubye!

Well I am feeling much better these days.
There is still some haunting sense of urgency and occasionally paranoia-but that has become the norm so I won't fret about it.
Existentialism has become exhausting and I prefer to stay in the moment. I can't lay about feeling perplexed anymore, I have a life to live.
I am staying busy.
Whether it be artsy fartsy hour or the mundane household chores-I stay on top of it.
I am slowly welcoming challenges, even the smallest were like moving a mountain at one time. Now I am a bit more at ease and less resistant to the changes I know are coming.
Times are difficult but somehow I have maintained the stiff upper lip.
I have become intolerant of pessimism-everyday it becomes more and more obvious what a pitiful self fulfilling prophecy it is.
Lighten up dammit.

Tony and I are managing this whole life business-not perfectly obviously but I trust that in time things will get better.  
Despite the setbacks we are still quite happy together.
My world is so much better with him in it.


There is a juried art show in hastings.
I gotta make a self portrait.


much love DA people

So I seem to be stuck in this weird, brooding frame of mind.  I can't seem to work up the motivation to do anything and when I do, I do everything poorly.
I feel deflated if not a bit lightheaded at times. Its just weird, I suspect mental vampires...
I have lost the magic that had me wired during the spring. I am incredibly uninspired and lethargic. I could sleep for days.
The world has got me down I suppose.
Unless there is a drastic change in attitude, I doubt I will be submitting anything new. Sorry.
I just feel terrible and my mind has become miles and miles of empty desert.
I suppose I will handle this like I always do-lock myself inside, stare out the window and listen to Holst.
A quiet mind torments me more than anything.


I miss my family..

Well it looks like my grandparents will be able to keep their home. It is structurally sound.  There was considerable damage obviously and the whole place has to be gutted. It will be a long project but with help from the family, it could be done by the end of the summer.
I am in a considerably better frame of mind now.  

I have another 2 ft. board I am working with.  Looks pretty sweet so far, lets just hope I can get a decent picture of it.

A gallery owner in Lincoln has asked to see some of my work.  Wish me luck.


Well I can't kick caffeine but I can be rid of pop now that I can buy ginormous jugs of arizona green tea.
I have my coffee so I don't have to deal with the headaches and fatigue that comes with caffeine withdrawal.


Now I just gotta quit smoking...although I should do that when I am certain I have someone willing to shoot me down with their disappointment canons should I slip up.

Well now I am babbling.
Hope all is well in the world of you.

Well the rampant storms that plagued the midwest moved on towards the east and southern Indiana was hit by massive rain. Worst flood in over a hundred years.
Columbus (where i was born) was hit especially hard and my grandparents lost their house when a dam broke.  This kind of thing never happens there so it was pretty shocking for everyone.  It is hard to tell how many homes have been lost.
The flooding has spread to Seymour and many people have had to evacuate their homes.  Luckily my parents live in Brownstown which is pretty much on a hill, so the flooding will not reach them.  There is still more rain on the way.
Many people have lost their homes, crops are out of the question, completely lost.  So many people are going to suffer.  Columbus hospital has been severely damaged and the Seymour hospital is completely full and may need to be evacuated.  It is really bad...
Needless to say I am feeling especially despondent and helpless being all the way in Nebraska away from the family.

Life is pretty shitty right now

My skin has been scorched to a lovely lobster red.
I hate sunburn!
My forearms are extra crispy...and look ridiculous.  Its like I have pink gloves on.
The magenta plague has also contaminated my nose and cheeks and scalp and....AHHH!!

Goddamn you sun!! damn you to hell!

What ever happened to springtime?  I know it used to exist.
Its just not natural to end winter and go straight into summer, its blowing my mind.


I haven't been submitting anything lately but just you wait!  I've got a bitchin cool picture coming up soon.  It'll make your brain tingle...or you might just shrug and say
'ok....thats it?'

My eye finally did stop twitching, I purposely overslept like crazy.  It hasn't come back.  Woots all around.
Super happy manic optimistic phase has also come to an end...hence the lethargy and overall bitchiness.  I seem to loathe the very sight of human beings at times.  Things feel hopeless.  Bouts of self pity.  Bad dreams.  No confidence.
Pretty much the exact opposite of how I felt before.  
But fear not, super ewicca might come back.

Wish me happy thoughts.

Please...
For the love of god, someone please tell me how to make my eye stop twitching.
It is making me freaking crazy!!

Ahem, anyway...
Had this account for quite awhile. So far my most productive month was september 2006 and that was only because I had resubmitted all of my old drawings from my previous account.
This month I have tied with september...this is the most productive month ever!  12 deviations, maybe 13 by tomorrow if I am feeling dangerous.
I don't feel so monstrously lazy any more.

Tony has confirmed my theory multiple times this month that he is, in fact, the best boyfriend ever.

round of applause for good ole Antonio!

I have ruined my sleep schedule and am now back to vampire hours.
Woe is me.

I have gotten an incredible amount of sweetness from you loyal watchers.
I wanna hug you but I can't.  

Thank you and goodnight...morning...